Welcome to Lion Heart

I’m Jordan. A trauma therapist and chronic pain human. I am passionate about the outdoors, travel, animals, learning, and human connection. I am starting this blog as a small way to get helpful information out there to people without them needing to schedule a full session for a little wellness boost. Self-awareness and personal growth aren’t always fun, but maybe sometimes these posts will be. Expect true grounding tools and quick brain resets coming in the future. And no shame if these don’t work for you yet. Your brain is still healing. Welcome to the party! I’m glad you’re here.

When it comes to healing, we often hear clichés said by well-intentioned people:

Let it go…
Take some deep breaths…
Calm down…
Go to the gym…
Just say “no…”
Love yourself…

Yeah, okay. Let it go. Why didn’t I think of that? Thanks, I’m cured! [Insert eye roll here.] What does any of this actually mean and how can we accomplish it? 

When I used to hear phrases like that, I would use my classic go-to responses: “Thank you for saying that,” “you’re right,” and “I just need to let it go.” I would people-please and think it was my fault that I couldn’t move forward from a problem. I then busied my mind with something else, maybe burnt holes in my journal with my pen trying to verbally process. And as I’d lie awake late at night, I’d still be sucked onto the same rumination highway about what I could have done instead to fix whatever the situation was that they thought they had fixed for me with their advice.

I’ve also contributed to the issue. Simply giving clients tools as the answer was creating a culture where clients couldn’t be honest with me. And it wasn’t their fault! I was telling them that if they set that boundary with their sister they would feel better. If they were too nervous to set the boundary, they might tell me they did it anyway just so they wouldn’t have to feel like they failed. As therapists, we are taught that the therapeutic tools work and some clients just “aren’t ready” to change. While that might be true sometimes, many clients ARE ready, and they’re desperately asking for a therapist to listen to what is getting in the way of the life they want. What makes you hesitant to set boundaries? How can we help the brain process that emotion and make room for more confidence? 

When I first learned about Brainspotting, I thought it sounded too good to be true. And maybe even a little awkward… Not a lot of talking? Staring in one spot and just silently weeping in front of someone? Weird. But since heavily implementing Brainspotting into my practice for the majority of my career, I cannot deny the changes I’ve seen in myself and the people I work with. 

Instead of repeating positive self-talk they don’t yet believe, journaling their feelings daily, trying not to be attracted to narcissists on dating apps, and ultimately hustling for their self-worth, they just… changed. Before they realized it, they started to believe the compliments they heard from others, their closest relationships became more empathetic and understanding, they had the confidence to speak up, they started sleeping better, they tried new things… the list goes on and on. 

Brainspotting and the other modalities I use help me to be curious about the obstacles instead of pushing for results. What parts of you need more compassion and attention before they can “let go”? Brainspotting creates an opportunity for the brain to heal itself. Your brain and body have a deep intelligence far beyond what we might even be aware of. It knows how to heal without us trying to white-knuckle what we think we should be thinking and feeling. That sounds ambiguous, but I’ve seen the proof over and over and over (and over) again! 

When I started doing my own personal Brainspotting, I learned how to stop the “fake it ‘til you make it” mentality, and actually just feel like I wanted to feel. I didn’t have to force it, fake it, or hide it. I simply felt different. Then my world started to look different too.

If you’re here because you’re failing at your journaling and self-talk homework, same. Those are great tools when your brain is actually ready for them. If you’re here as a high-achieving superhuman, but have only a faint idea about what’s going on deep down? Been there too. It is possible to still be highly functioning and deeply knowing. Your brain knows how to get you there. 

I’m listening. Let’s get to work.